He felt resentful at the loss of their relationship and of their marriage. The memory of his three years in London and on his assignments, when to all intents and purposes he was busy, successful and sexually satisfied, but where in all his quieter moments he longed for his ex-wife, made him burn with anger that he was never given a chance with her.Now he knew she had been enjoying life with another man in another man’s bed, though she had said she’d longed for him until she thought he was beyond her.He could now look back on those feelings and let them go, but he wondered about the real character of the woman he had once loved. Once loved? Yes, he thought, once.He was feeling depressed when he went to bed, and the empty house seemed to echo and amplify his own solitary state.After lunch on Sunday, he and his father were sitting out on their terrace drinking their coffee and supping their cognacs.“Something on your mind?” asked his Dad.“Carol,” John said, and no more. He knew his. I approach a cliff, which sticks out from the mountain, like a gray and brown massive wall. And in it a narrow crack, 20 feet wide and some 60 feet deep, filled with a clear pool of water, which feeds the stream I follow. Yet one can see beyond this break in the wall of cliff and open area beyond, the sun is bright the day pleasantly warm. I am drawn to see what lies beyond this cleft before me the water clear and inviting.I shed my cloths and savor the caress of the breeze and warmth of the sun on my skin, a moment's freedom from the conventions of cloths. I dive into the pool, the shock of the cold water in a way inviting, (I'm surprised it did not wake me to wakefulness). I swim to the other side of the pool, beneath its surface, through clear sun filled water (would death be like this, a moment of shock and cold, and then a timeless moment of peace and beauty?) I climb out of the water.The coolness of the water falls away pleasantly from my skin warmed again by the sun. The.
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